from the kitchen of a genius
I like to consider myself a good cook. In the past couple years, I've learned how to have everything ready at the same time, how to make sauces out of all kinds of ingredients, and how to improvise when you find out 6 more people are coming to community group than you had planned on feeding.
Since Spain doesn't offer many pre-packaged meals, and fresh stuff is the cheapest, I've learned to cook from scratch, and except for a few incredibly bad dinners, I do ok. I don't always (or ever) stick to the rules of the recipe, but all kitchen artists are allowed a little "creative license," right? Anyway, whether it's true or not, I like to think of myself as a better cook than most, or at least some, American girls my age.
Today I ventured into baking. I'm making brownies for my community group's Christmas party tonight. Now I've made brownies before in the States, and it only takes a few minutes to put everything together. Granted, everything's already in a box and only requires eggs, but still, how hard can it be? I am a genius in the kitchen.
Come to find out, baking has some pretty hard and fast rules that you can't break. Here are a few that I learned tonight.
1) Yes, you actually are required to measure things.
2) Every house should have a spatula. If not, you will have chocolate up to your
elbows.
3) No one's going to help you figure out how exactly to put HALF an egg in the bowl,
or what to do with the other half. You're a grownup now--figure it out yourself!
4) Spanish brown sugar is not the same consistency of American brown sugar. The
jury's still out as to whether this will affect the outcome of the brownie.
5) You have kitchen appliances for a reason. You won't get any bonus points for mixing things by hand when you could have used the mixer. And again, you will have chocolate up to your elbows, as well as a sore arm.
6) Buy twice as much chocolate as the recipe calls for. I'll explain later.
7) If you try to melt chocolate in the microwave, you should probably check on it once in a while. If it's smoking when it comes out, you might have overdone it a bit. If it has black, charcoal like lumps in it, you've definitely overdone it.
8) Chocolate is one of the best smells in the world, so it would stand to reason that burnt chocolate is a slightly singed version of one of the best smells in the world. That is a lie. It smells like burnt hope or a crushed dream. Or an unemptied garbage can.
9) Go light every candle and all the incense in the apartment immediately after burning chocolate, so that your guests don't walk in and say "Who burned brownies?"
10) Now take out the second half of the chocolate you bought. (I told you I would explain) and try melting it on the stove. Don't burn it--you only bought enough to mess up once.
11) You should have read all the directions before going to the store, not just the list of ingredients. They assume you'll have something to grease the pan with.
12) They also assume that you know to preheat the oven before you mix stuff together so that you don't have to wait another 10 minutes for it to heat up, stupid.
13) Flour goes everywhere, even if you're careful. You'll be finding flour for the next 3 days. And if it sticks to the chocolate that is up to your elbows, you may never be clean again.
14) Leave time for a shower before your guests arrive. You'll need it.
15) Baking is harder than cooking.
So the final version of the batter is in the oven, and if nothing else, the batter tasted good. I still have my doubts as to whether or not it will turn into brownies.
I think I'll stick to the stovetop from now on.
Since Spain doesn't offer many pre-packaged meals, and fresh stuff is the cheapest, I've learned to cook from scratch, and except for a few incredibly bad dinners, I do ok. I don't always (or ever) stick to the rules of the recipe, but all kitchen artists are allowed a little "creative license," right? Anyway, whether it's true or not, I like to think of myself as a better cook than most, or at least some, American girls my age.
Today I ventured into baking. I'm making brownies for my community group's Christmas party tonight. Now I've made brownies before in the States, and it only takes a few minutes to put everything together. Granted, everything's already in a box and only requires eggs, but still, how hard can it be? I am a genius in the kitchen.
Come to find out, baking has some pretty hard and fast rules that you can't break. Here are a few that I learned tonight.
1) Yes, you actually are required to measure things.
2) Every house should have a spatula. If not, you will have chocolate up to your
elbows.
3) No one's going to help you figure out how exactly to put HALF an egg in the bowl,
or what to do with the other half. You're a grownup now--figure it out yourself!
4) Spanish brown sugar is not the same consistency of American brown sugar. The
jury's still out as to whether this will affect the outcome of the brownie.
5) You have kitchen appliances for a reason. You won't get any bonus points for mixing things by hand when you could have used the mixer. And again, you will have chocolate up to your elbows, as well as a sore arm.
6) Buy twice as much chocolate as the recipe calls for. I'll explain later.
7) If you try to melt chocolate in the microwave, you should probably check on it once in a while. If it's smoking when it comes out, you might have overdone it a bit. If it has black, charcoal like lumps in it, you've definitely overdone it.
8) Chocolate is one of the best smells in the world, so it would stand to reason that burnt chocolate is a slightly singed version of one of the best smells in the world. That is a lie. It smells like burnt hope or a crushed dream. Or an unemptied garbage can.
9) Go light every candle and all the incense in the apartment immediately after burning chocolate, so that your guests don't walk in and say "Who burned brownies?"
10) Now take out the second half of the chocolate you bought. (I told you I would explain) and try melting it on the stove. Don't burn it--you only bought enough to mess up once.
11) You should have read all the directions before going to the store, not just the list of ingredients. They assume you'll have something to grease the pan with.
12) They also assume that you know to preheat the oven before you mix stuff together so that you don't have to wait another 10 minutes for it to heat up, stupid.
13) Flour goes everywhere, even if you're careful. You'll be finding flour for the next 3 days. And if it sticks to the chocolate that is up to your elbows, you may never be clean again.
14) Leave time for a shower before your guests arrive. You'll need it.
15) Baking is harder than cooking.
So the final version of the batter is in the oven, and if nothing else, the batter tasted good. I still have my doubts as to whether or not it will turn into brownies.
I think I'll stick to the stovetop from now on.
posted by kelly_w at 5:01 PM
1 Comments:
My mum loved our brownies, can u give me the recipe?
Thanks babe!
See u thurs!
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