The Grossest thing Ever
Just in case you wondered, I love Madrid. I love living here, and there are tons of good things about the city. Unfortunately, those things don't make interesting stories. The story I am about to tell you is not for the faint of heart or for the weak of stomach. This is the literal DIRT of everyday life in the city.
There are tons of alimentaciones in my neighborhood--little stores with everything a gas station market in the States would sell, except the store fits it all into a room 1/10 the size of a gas station market, and there are usually some gummies of questionable freshness that can be dipped out of plastic bins. I pass 2 or 3 alimentaciones in my walk from the Moncloa metro station to my apartment.
It happened a few months ago, in the hottest part of the summer, when everyone feels gross anway. One day, as I was walking home from the metro, I saw a man in front of the alimentacion furiously trying to shove something into a garbage can on the sidewalk. Whatever the package was, it was bigger than the hole, and it looked like a wrestling match, and the package was winning. As I neared, slowing down to watch such an unusual show of activity in the 40+ (100+F) weather, the whole scene came into focus. The "package" was actually one of the largest pigeons I have ever seen in my life, limp and lifeless, held by the foot. With each bang against the small opening, feathers flew and it became disfigured a bit more.
Believe me, I am no pigeon sympathizer. Since one decided that my head was a public toilet in March, I daily fight the urge to kick them as I walk down the street. Still, witnessing it's plight for a proper burial evoked more emotion than I expected. No wait, that was my gag reflex.
By this time, the man had both hands on the body of the pigeon, pushing with all his might until, POP, it finally passed through the hole and came to rest. Finally, the scene was over. I could go home in peace. Nothing grosser could happen. The pigeon was beyond reach.
It was at that moment that I watched the impromptu pigeon coroner announce that he had finished his work....by brushing his hands against each other, sighing, and going back inside and BEHIND THE COUNTER OF THE ALIMENTACION WHERE HE WAS WORKING!!!! No instant hand sanitizer, not even a paper towel.
Needless to say, I buy my gummies elsewhere.
There are tons of alimentaciones in my neighborhood--little stores with everything a gas station market in the States would sell, except the store fits it all into a room 1/10 the size of a gas station market, and there are usually some gummies of questionable freshness that can be dipped out of plastic bins. I pass 2 or 3 alimentaciones in my walk from the Moncloa metro station to my apartment.
It happened a few months ago, in the hottest part of the summer, when everyone feels gross anway. One day, as I was walking home from the metro, I saw a man in front of the alimentacion furiously trying to shove something into a garbage can on the sidewalk. Whatever the package was, it was bigger than the hole, and it looked like a wrestling match, and the package was winning. As I neared, slowing down to watch such an unusual show of activity in the 40+ (100+F) weather, the whole scene came into focus. The "package" was actually one of the largest pigeons I have ever seen in my life, limp and lifeless, held by the foot. With each bang against the small opening, feathers flew and it became disfigured a bit more.
Believe me, I am no pigeon sympathizer. Since one decided that my head was a public toilet in March, I daily fight the urge to kick them as I walk down the street. Still, witnessing it's plight for a proper burial evoked more emotion than I expected. No wait, that was my gag reflex.
By this time, the man had both hands on the body of the pigeon, pushing with all his might until, POP, it finally passed through the hole and came to rest. Finally, the scene was over. I could go home in peace. Nothing grosser could happen. The pigeon was beyond reach.
It was at that moment that I watched the impromptu pigeon coroner announce that he had finished his work....by brushing his hands against each other, sighing, and going back inside and BEHIND THE COUNTER OF THE ALIMENTACION WHERE HE WAS WORKING!!!! No instant hand sanitizer, not even a paper towel.
Needless to say, I buy my gummies elsewhere.
posted by kelly_w at 11:29 PM
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